Monday, 1 March 2021

Hanging With Hazel: My job description

Hanging With Hazel: A successful working (from home) dog's job description 

Hanging With Hazel: A successful working (from home) dog's job description


You all know me- I'm Hazel. The last time I barked at you I told you all about how happy I am that mum and I work from home to stay safe from the rona. I told you all of the things I like about it, but I forgot to tell you about my job. Now that you know I work from home, let me tell you a little about what I do. I wear many collars here at work. My role here is vital to our success. Some days I feel a little micromanaged by mum, but since I love her I tolerate it. These are some of my job duties. I can't wait for you to learn about how pawesome of a worker I am!



I'm a Certified Pillow Relocator. There are lots of pillows on our couch. Too many if you ask me. I develop creative ways of relocating the pillows to the floor. Sometimes it is an ongoing process of moving the pillows from one side of the couch to the other. But ultimately the goal is to relocate them to the floor. I'm great at it! My big paws are great for kicking pillows off the couch.


Hanging with Hazel the Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction

I'm also a fantastic Walking Guide. I lead us up snowbanks, through parks, in the water, and I'm great at finding the sidewalks with the most amount of food on them. If it wasn't for my expert guiding skills mum would never end up with snow in her boots! I provide her with a realistic, snow-to-foot experience. When I see a bunny I promote myself from Walking Guide to Running Guide. Chasing bunnies is at the top of the list of my favourite job duties. This is the task mum tries to micromanage the most. 


Hanging with Hazel the Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction

I am the Senior Snuggle Manager at our workplace. I excel in this role. No one can out-snuggle me! I find it really helps boost morale. Out of all of the many jobs in my job description, I think this is the one mum likes most. Me too!


Hanging with Hazel the Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction

The most rewarding part of my job is getting to be the Lead Fluff Distributor. There are a lot of items with fluff in them and it's my job to get it out- by any means necessary. Then I make sure I evenly distribute it throughout the house. 


Hanging with Hazel the Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction

I'm so good at it that I've been promoted to Executive Officer of Toy Decapitation. I find that the best way to get the fluff out is to remove the head. If heads are rolling I know I've done a good job. I wonder if I'll earn a bonus for making the squeaking stop?


Hanging with Hazel the Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction


When It comes to working with toys I'm a really good multitasker. I can work with multiple toys at one time. Mum likes to challenge me at work by putting the toys back in the toy box. It gives me an opportunity to take them all out and try again. To prove myself. 

Hanging with Hazel the Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction

Throughout the day I also act as mum's Bathroom Assistant. I make sure she always has company when she's on the toilet. She should never have to visit the bathroom without a Hazel butt to scratch or my watchful eyes- especially the eye that blinks. It's just another way that we work well as a team. 

Hanging with Hazel the Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction

Guess what? I'm the best Lunchbreak Enforcer in the business! I wasn't hired for this but I saw a necessary job not being done and I stepped up to the plate. I'm really self-motivated, especially when it comes to food. Plus, if I enforce mum's lunchbreak then I get some yummies when she's all finished. It's a win-win situation.


Hanging with Hazel the Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction


I'm also a Professional Plate Cleaner. I have 5 years of experience in this role. I really enjoy this job. The best word I can use to describe it is 'yummy.' I'm also a Professional Floor Cleaner. Truthfully, I'll clean up any fallen food. I'll clean it off the couch, the chairs, the floor, the bed. I'm a team player and I don't discriminate.


Hanging with Hazel dog Paws For Reaction


I'm a great problem solver. Mum gives me special projects every day. She gives me treat-dispensing toys and it is my job to get all the kibbles out. It's the role I was born to play. I work relentlessly at getting the kibbles out of those toys. It's tiring work, but someone's got to do it. 


Hanging with Hazel the Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction

I do some seasonal work as well. In the winter I'm a Snow Painter. I only work with one colour though; yellow. One thing I don't do is pick up my own poop. That's not my job and way above my pay grade. Mum has told me several times that she wishes I would pick up my own poop, but when I try to pick it up my way she gets mad... Sometimes it's hard to know what my boss expects of me.

Hanging with Hazel the Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction

I'm an excellent employee. I'm never late, in fact, I wake mum up for work. I have a positive, can-do attitude. But since it's only mum and me, I don't have anyone to argue in my favour. I feel I deserve a raise. I'd like three treats an hour and four walks a day. Long walks. Based on my experience and performance I feel this is fair. Can you help me? Give me a peer evaluation in the comments to tell mum I deserve a raise. Or I'm walking! Off-leash! I'll leave and go work wherever that bunny works.

Hanging with Hazel Saint Bernese Dog Paws For Reaction




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1 comment:

  1. Hahaha...that’s cute and I think Hazel deserves everything she wants and more. You don’t want to lose her to another employer.
    Keep up the good work Hazel!

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